Divined through twelve sacred empty bean cans ‘neath a full moon and a cracklin’ trash fire. Take heed, wayfarers of the stars, for ol’ Harry’s got the truth clankin’ in his cans today…
♈ Aries (March 21 – April 19)
The pinto bean can rattled wild, Aries — like a railcar with no brakes. Today, your boldness might lead to frayed tempers or accidental pie theft. Keep a cool head and avoid arguing with strangers over who called shotgun on the boxcar roof. Opportunities to lead come after you listen first. Watch for signs carved into trees.
♉ Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Taurus, your lima bean can was stubbornly silent, but that’s your way, ain’t it? Today’s about holdin’ steady. You might be lured by shiny trinkets or a mysterious suitcase abandoned under a bridge. Don’t be fooled — not all treasures are worth the fleas. Value what’s real: a friend, a warm fire, a dry sock.
♊ Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
The twin cans (navy beans) clinked in eerie harmony. You’re full of chatter today, Gemini, spinning tales to strangers and whisperin’ secrets to alley cats. But beware: too many stories may make truth hard to spot. Use that silver tongue to mend fences and barter sandwiches, not stir trouble.
♋ Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
The baked bean can wept with dew, little Crab. Emotions run high today, maybe from an old tune on a harmonica or a smell of home cookin’ on the wind. Nostalgia may try to drag you back like a riptide — resist. Instead, use your shell for protection and comfort someone else carryin’ sorrow. Kindness is your firewood today.
♌ Leo (July 23 – August 22)
The chili bean can burst into sudden heat — mighty Leo, your pride burns bright today. You may find yourself standin’ atop the coal car, chest out, declaimin’ poems to the stars. Just be sure you’re not shoutin’ over someone else’s quiet song. Share the spotlight, and you’ll earn applause and an extra crust.
♍ Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
The black bean can rolled itself into a neat spiral. Precision, Virgo — it’s your superpower. Today’s the day for organizing your bindle, rearranging your thoughts, and maybe teachin’ a young hopper how to tie a proper sack knot. Don’t get lost in perfection — a little soot never killed nobody.
♎ Libra (September 23 – October 22)
The kidney bean cans swayed gently on their strings. Libra, you’re seekin’ balance, but today the scales tip back and forth like a loose caboose. A choice must be made: share your last biscuit or keep it for later. Don’t fret — generosity will be repaid tenfold by the hobo gods (or a raccoon with a grudge and a gift).
♏ Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
The refried bean can hissed with steam — Scorpio, your secrets bubble close to the surface today. You’re mysterious as a locked boxcar. Someone may try to pry — let ‘em, just a little. Vulnerability ain’t weakness. But if they cross a line, bury their boots in the mud and move on. Trust your gut, but don’t bite without cause.
♐ Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
The garbanzo bean can pointed due west. Adventure calls, Sag, like a far-off train whistle at dusk. Today brings a chance to go somewhere new — whether it’s a physical place or just a fresh way of thinkin’. Say yes to the unknown. But carry extra jerky — freedom’s no good on an empty stomach.
♑ Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
The cannellini bean can stood firm, even in the wind. Hard work’s your drumbeat, Capricorn. Today’s good for climbin’ — up hills, outta ruts, or into the trust of that grouchy old engineer. Don’t rush; steady steps win the day. Your effort earns you a seat by the fire and a tale well told.
♒ Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
The mung bean can hummed with static — Aquarius, your mind’s sparkin’ again. You might invent a better way to cook soup with just a shoelace and a sardine tin. Today favors wild ideas and rebellious kindness. Shake up the camp routine, but don’t forget to explain yourself — not everyone hears the same radio in their skull.
♓ Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
The butter bean can shimmered with strange light. Dreams and visions drift close today, Pisces — beware of gettin’ lost in ‘em. You might mistake a mirage for salvation. Keep your feet on the tracks, but let your spirit wander a bit. You’re the poet of the rails, after all. Someone needs your song.
So sayeth the cans, and so it shall be. Remember, the stars may guide ya, but your boots still gotta walk the path. Keep your sack tied, your eyes open, and your heart soft like boiled beans.
– Hobo Harry
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